Post Date: May 15, 2020

Dating app conversations are unlike regular, real-life conversations. Often, the user takes a long time to respond, has a lengthy response, or even worse, has a short dull response.

Too often, we’ll meet someone on a dating app that fits what we’re looking for physically, however mentally, they’re uninspiring.

This is common among dating apps and should not be taken personally. In this article, we will cover why you may have dull conversations with other users and ways you can enlighten the conversation.

Why You’re Getting Dull Conversation

First, let’s start with why you may be getting dull conversations from other users. A lot of it has to do with how you start the conversation. Let’s learn more.

They’re Not Interested

The first and most obvious is they’re not interested in you, or they’re starting to lose interest. It hurts to realize this, as you may have had an initial spark with this person.

However, we’ve seen numerous users have a great conversation on the initial match and have seen it fade over time. This is typical because the person you matched with has lost interest in you.

If a person is interested, they will consistently check in and keep the conversation going. The downfall of dating apps is that users have access to multiple matches while they’re talking to you. This could spark the interest of someone else, which will require more of their attention.

It’s a tough pill to swallow, but if the conversation started hot and it died down, it may be because they’re not interested.

They Have Poor Communication Skills

If the person is short of answering you from the start or doesn’t respond promptly, it may be for a few reasons.

Free Images : smartphone, mobile, writing, hand, technology ...

First, they may be introverted and don’t have too much to say. This can be the case for both girls and guys who don’t put too much effort into texting and like to keep things short and sweet.

Short answers don’t necessarily mean they’re not interested; it could be just how they communicate.

Second, the user may have poor communication skills or maybe only put half the effort into online dating. Girls or guys who have busy jobs may only check their dating apps at night when they finally hit the couch or bed. This doesn’t necessarily mean they’re not interested; it’s just they have poor communication habits.

It’s important to determine early on in the conversation if it’s worth moving forward with a person based on their texting habits. If you’re someone who needs quick and constant communication, this may be a make-or-break quality for you.

How To Improve The Conversation On Dating Apps

Similar to if you would go to a bar with a friend, we’re going to show you how you can improve your conversation on dating apps and win every conversation you enter into.

Be Different From Other Users

First and foremost, be different from other users. Every day, guys and girls have the same conversations with each other when they first match. It usually consists of where they work, hobbies, and family life.

Online Dating Heart Man - Free image on Pixabay

We recommend you have 2-3 out-of-the-ordinary questions ready to go; that way, you can stimulate the other person’s mind. Due to the fact you’ve matched, it means the other person likes your physical features; now it’s time to enlighten them with your mental features.

We recommend looking at their pictures and asking them to tell you about their experiences with different travel stories. Ask them questions about their bio and why they think the way they do. Stray away from the normal boring conversation. Remember, laughter always wins.

Stay away from questions about exes, religion, or anything controversial that may take the conversation for the worst.

Ask Questions

Every human loves to be heard. Asking questions will require the person to stay engaged with you, and they’re more likely to keep the conversation going. As you’re feeling the person out over time, don’t be afraid to dig a little bit to see how the person is feeling. If they seem interested enough, this is the perfect time to ask them out on a date.

We often see users fail to have a quality first date because they don’t spend enough time asking questions about their match, which results in a poor first date.

Prepare yourself to have small inside jokes on the first date; that way, you can always refer back to something when you meet them in person. The more you know about them, the more equipped you’ll be to make an informed decision about another date.

Tell It Like It Is

When matching with someone new, be sure to tell them everything you do and don’t like when they ask you a question. Too often, users sugarcoat their answers, then 2-3 months down the road, they don’t like something.

For instance, if you don’t want your spouse to smoke and occasionally smoke, be honest and upfront if that conversation ever comes up. If you hide your feelings or thoughts to be nice too often, you’ll jump into something and then jump out a few months later.

If you’re curious about how old your matches pictures are, ask. Don’t be afraid to ask tough questions. Remember, you’re trying to put yourself in the best position possible to find a soul mate. Hiding your feelings or emotions will lead to future mishaps.

❤️ Pro Tip: If you’re sick of finding people who are just looking for one-night stands, we recommend trying eHarmony.

It’s one of the highest-rated online dating apps in the world. eHarmony users are actually actively looking for relationships. Give it a try here for free and see if you can tell the difference.


Dating apps will often have dull conversations with the other user. The important part is to make sure that we’re full of life, and naturally, the vibe we give out will attract the right person.

If you’re optimistic and free-spirited, then display that at all times during your conversation. If you are an introvert and don’t communicate well, use dating apps to work on your skill set. There’s always room for improvement and ways to find someone who is like-minded.

Let us know if you have any issues with dull conversation and how you’ve overcome it while on dating apps. We’re interested in learning why users are dull with you and if there’s any way we can help improve your dating conversations.

About the Author

Julia has over 10+ years in the mobile dating app space as a consultant and analyst. Her work has been featured on top websites like Mashable and Women's Health Mag. She writes these blogs to help singles find their true love and life long companion!